What NOT to say to Jennifer about the wedding

Everybody tells me that most people have two cents for new moms and for brides. It's already started for me. There are some good comments and suggestions, but this post is reserved for my favorite BAD comments.

1. "The veil is what makes you the bride." Um, no, when Keith and I say our vows to each other, that's what makes me the bride, thank you very much. I will not be swayed to spend more money in your store when you sentimentalize my clothes! (By the way, readers, I am wearing a veil, but I got it on eBay, too, for a third of the retail price, so no one who gave me a sales pitch like THAT one got any of my money!)

2. "You need to...." However that sentence ends, my answer is, "No, I don't NEED to anything." I don't NEED to buy a picnic basket so our caterer can fill it with food that we can eat after the reception. I don't NEED to have a large flower bouquet on the food table. And, I certainly don't NEED to pay for someone to drive me to my wedding!

3. "My husband asked me if I wanted a diamond larger than a half carat now that we can afford more because we did the best we could before we got married." Hello?! I'm quite proud of my less-than-half-carat engagement ring, thank you very much. We aren't spending money to get the best we can afford; we spend money to get what we like. Bigger isn't always better, in case no one has ever given you that memo. I like my ring. I think the diamond is the right size for my hand. In fact, I put a cap on the size of the diamond that Keith could buy, and my CAP was a half carat. So, there!

(Keith was quite entertained by my rants over the weekend, so I thought I'd share them with you. My mom has been really great about ideas for the wedding. She started it all with, "Are you going to wear a dress or pants?" She's also the one who gave me a book about doing what matters to the bride and the groom in a wedding, not necessarily what everyone else thinks you NEED to do.)