My BFFL!

On our first date, Keith and I went to Chili's. He had monterrey chicken, and I ate the philly cheesesteak. (He did a better job of following the "don't eat complicated food on a date" rule!)

We talked about everything, including our waiter's shaved arms. We were having a good time, and the conversation was natural. I had to take stock of what was happening at one point, and I realized that it felt like we were good friends. I remember being disappointed, but it was brief because I had to tune back in to the conversation. We shut the place down sometime after 11pm on a Wednesday night.

Later, I came back to the realization that the conversation felt like friendship to me, and I was disappointed again. I don't need more friends--I like the ones I have very much! Then, it dawned on me: I'd heard people talk about marrying their best friend, and I'd forgotten all about that. I was okay with friendship then, and I told Keith about my realization that we were becoming good friends. I skipped the part about wanting to marry my best friend, though!

When I wrote to Keith about being friends, he got concerned. For him, what I wrote gave him the impression that I was "casting him into the friend zone." I was floored! That was hardly my point! I was excited to tell him that it felt like a good friendship to me, and he was disappointed with the news. It took a while to convince him that being friends is a good thing, but I'm pretty sure he's convinced now.

It's true: Keith is a friend. I want to call him first when something happens. I value his opinion when I need to make a decision. I enjoy being with him whether we're talking or quiet.

Last summer, I spent six weeks living on the same college campus as 700 teenagers at the Georgia Governor's Honors Program. The kids are really smart, but they're also really teenagers. They reminded me of the "teen-speak" that we see on tv, and Keith and I got new nicknames because of them: BFFL. Teenagers use it very casually, but the literal translation is "best friend for life." For the first time in my life, I can use that term accurately. Keith will be my best friend for the rest of my life, and I'll be his best friend, too!

Good things happened at Chili's on that cool February night. I became friends with the love of my life!